Hot Dog: a word that has more definitions than you’d think, including a verb? Seriously, look up hot dog definition, its hilarious. But for today’s purposes, I’ll be using the noun definition of “a frankfurter, especially one served hot in a long, soft roll and topped with various condiments.”
A lot of people claim to have beef (pun very much intended) with this tube meat product, but I am personally a big fan of this American delicacy. When faced with the choice between a burger or a dog, I’m doggin’ it up. It is my opinion (and the correct opinion), that the hot dog at cookout will almost always be better than the burger option, the only situation that I’d prefer a burger is if it is at a restaurant with some nice pepperjack cheese and a bomb sauce. For years of my youth, my birthday meal would legitimately be just hot dogs. I used to not even eat the bun with my hot dog, just cut up dog with ketchup on a plate. I’d like to say that ended after I was like, a baby, but more realistically it probably went until I was eight or something. I also used to made the Kraft mac & cheese but not add the cheese packet, so it would just be mac.
People that say hotdogs are gross just have to grow up and get over themselves. You aren’t more cool than me just because you aren’t eating this processed meat product, you aren’t getting a medal, all you’re doing is betraying our founding fathers. I’m pretty sure there’s a line in the Constitution that has a requirement of citizenship being eating a hotdog once a year and/or competing/watching at least one hotdog eating competition in your life. Even our last few presidents have iconic photos of them chowing down on some dogs. There are some bullcrap articles that say eating one hotdog takes 35 minutes off your life, but a life without the dog is simply just not a life worth living.
In conclusion, man up, shoot a deer, light some pyrotechnics, and eat a hotdog this summer.
