To some, the arrival of October and Autumn means Halloween, football, coffee shops, and American Eagle sweaters. But, here in ol’ red white and blue country, as soon as that first leaf falls on the ground, the whole world goes orange, including the food.
That’s right, pumpkin spice becomes the spice of life to millions, and no products are safe from it. As a true #basicwhitechick, I have decided to take the responsibility of trying these pumpkin provisions to see if they are all that they claim to be, or if they fall short. So allow me to be your guide through the pumpkin patch.
La Colombe pumpkin spice latte: This little pumpkin pick-me-up opened a CAN of taste on my tongue. The froth was frothing, but the pumpkin was not pumpkining. The after taste kind of reminded me of pickled ginger, like the stuff you get with a supermarket California roll. I didn’t get a rush of pumpkin, but I certainly did get a rush of something. I had a condensed panic attack in the middle of Mrs. Nickles’ physics class about every responsibility in my life, so if you need a little jolt or minor heart attack in your day with the taste like you licked a pumpkin and then drank canned coffee, this is the drink for you!
Special K: A solid cereal, must say I had higher expectations for this one. The first bite I got had the sensation of spice, but beyond that, nada. I believe that the milk may have diluted the flavor, but at the same time, eating it dry didn’t give me any pumpkin induced endorphins. So, I suppose the optimal way to eat this is to just get a spoonful of cereal, pour a little milk on it, eat it, and repeat.
Pumpkin Spice English muffin (with pumpkin butter): This combination of pumpkin bread and butter makes for a scrumptious morning, afternoon, or even evening meal. The muffins on their own don’t do much for me, but I am pretty sure you can put this butter on a brick and I would still eat it.
Dunkin pumpkin spice Goldfish grahams: Every time I have to say what this product is I leave out one word, leading to much confusion for whoever is asking. Aside from the awkward title, these little fish are phenomenal. It’s a form of Goldfish you’ve never had before, and one you’d never regret having. Not sure why it’s in partnership with Dunkin, they really bring nothing to the table. Admittedly, the pumpkin flavor on these does leave something to be desired, but quite frankly, I don’t even care because they are so tasty.
Spicy Pumpkin Samosas: No, these are not samoas, the best girl scout cookies. Samosas are an Indian dish, pastry that is usually encasing a spiced filling of potatoes, onions, peas, and/or meat, but these ones use pumpkin! These bad boys come up big in the pumpkin department, and get extra snaps for being a more savory dish, which is a good change of pace after eating four other artificially sweet pumpkin snacks. Made me feel all warm and cozy inside. Airfrying yielded a better, more crisp samosa, but if you just want to microwave them, they can certainly stand up to the challenge.
Pumpkin Spice Oreos: Wow. A whole pumpkin pie in an Oreo. I love America. This cookie is only elevated by dipping it in milk, it really helps to mellow the sweetness a little bit. You should go out and buy these right now.
Pumpkin Spice Milanos: The rich mom’s version of Oreos. A bit more leaning towards the clove/allspice aspect than the cinnamon/nutmeg part, which I am not necessarily happy about. I like that they have some orange. That’s about it.
Pumpkin Pie spice powder: This probably has a use, just do not eat it straight up. It is not indeed like eating pumpkin pie in powder form.
I hope this review encourages you to spice up your life a bit this fall. It may be overdone, but this is our culture, and in a time of extreme division, it is important to indulge in all that will make us united. Other countries have ancient churches and ruins, but can you drink a Colosseum latte before school every morning from September to November? Didn’t think so.
