Can We Sport?

Can We Sport?

Girls Varsity Soccer Edition


On this edition of Can We????????,  Paige Wilson and I, Dara Patten, will be joining the girls soccer team for their practice and telling you how terribly we do! We are here to put our athletic skills to the test and our dignity on the line. You may be asking yourself, “Who are these people and what authority do they have to be trying these sports?” Don’t you worry, we can assure you that we are qualified. We gave ourselves the authority to tell you what we think about these sports’ practices and nobody can take it away from us.

I, Dara Patten, have been in a number of sports all of my life and currently play ice hockey, which keeps me in injured at all times but in some condition for athletic activities. Even though I consider myself mildly athletic, my skills and coordination will be put to the test.

Both Paige and I are certified quitters of more than 12 sports (a title bestowed by one Lara Ejzak)!!!!!! With a history of injury and sub-par sports performance, Paige’s qualifications to evaluate other sports are unmatched by any other critic of the decade, maybe even the century. That being said, we have started our sports hopping with Girls Varsity Soccer.

Now, beginning with the soccer team is a strategic choice on our part, as both Dara and I have extensive (1 combined year in U-8 KASA soccer) experience with the sport. Hopefully, our previous dubs will help us along our journey to rediscover the wonders of the biggest sport in (most of) the world.

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About the Contributors
Dara Patten
Dara Patten, Features Editor
Hello, I am Dara Patten! I am a senior here at Knoch High School! Most of my free time, for the last 12 years, has been taken up playing ice hockey. With my extra free time love to stay busy with school clubs and sports. I am involved in 10 school clubs, play varsity girls ice hockey, as well as club hockey, and am a manager for the track and field team.  Here are some random things about me: I love sharks but my favorite animal is an orca, my favorite color is red, I love nature and being outside, and I love my dog. Have a good day!
Paige Wilson
HEY YOU! I'm Paige, a senior here at Knoch High School! This is my first year in Newspaper, and I have high hopes considering I'm awesome and perfect at everything. I also play tennis and am involved in several clubs and activities. I'm a proud cat mom to my garbage street cat named Milo, and I love to skip school for field trips and pretend like I know what I'm doing in my calculus class. When I grow up I want to be a snake charmer or Neil deGrasse Tyson.

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